Part IV – Be supportable
In part III, I emphasized how your business must be appealing to your other half for him to want to be an active part. So, now he is interested … What happens next is up to you.
The paradox of gaining support from your significant other is that you really don’t need it. Like many women, you have stepped into the world of the entrepreneur and you are realizing the unlimited power & potential you hold.
It is a given, and one of my foundation principles, that no woman actually needs a man in order to be successful. (You will hear me repeat this many times – it is that important).
As your journey unfolds and you meet & interact with an increasing number of inspiring, empowered people, you find yourself growing in your power, confidence, abilities and capability.
And, the more you experience, the more you want to share it with the most important person in your life.
How does he fit in with new, powerful you? Unless he is sharing the journey with you, he is seeing you transform before his eyes into an amazing person he never knew existed. Probably a person YOU never knew existed.
I have the ultimate respect for women and their power & capabilities. Most of my inspiration and mentors are powerful women.
Thus, it is my belief that a woman can be fully in her power and still be the lady in her knight’s life. Granted, this may seem a little fairy tale-ish, or chauvinistic, but I believe it to be the truth.
It is empowering to a man to feel like they are needed and can be of service. Note that this doesn’t make you needy. It means that you are truly in your power and are willing to take advantage of the support that is available to you to best accomplish that which is most important to you.
This now puts the ball in your court.
You know that you must own your own success, appreciate that which you do have, and make your business appealing to your partner.
The quickest way to lose their interest is to not give them an opportunity to participate and support you.
Many powerful women are high-energy self-starters. They just get up and get going. They know what they want and are clear on their action plan for the day.
What happens if your other half is not in the loop? He won’t have any idea of what is going on in your world, where you’re at, where you’re going or what you need.
Of course, he would be not too smart to just sit around waiting for you to tell him something. He will probably just get on with his business or job, or any other task that needs to be done.
Remember that he is interested. Primarily interested in being of service to the most important person in his life. You.
Once again, it’s not about your business, it’s about your relationship. It is an opportunity to connect, to share and to do something together.
And your opportunity is to take a step back and look for ways that you can be supported. If nothing comes to mind, that is okay. He is not a little kid – you don’t have to come up with something for him to do, just to keep him content.
Are there things around the house that he could do that would assist you in focusing on your business? Are there any errands that he could do to optimize your schedule.
If you really want to give him something fun to do, tell him that you want to spend some time with him tonight and you would love for him to come up with a surprise.
Being supportable simply means that you are open to providing opportunities to be supported and that you are open to receiving.
Dong do clearly defines your business as an ‘us’ thing and something that he is welcome to participate in.
There is, of course, nothing wrong with wanting to achieve something by yourself. Just let him know what your intention is. And know that even the act of him being out of your space while you do what you need, is supporting you.
In summary: Gaining the support you desire requires that you be support-able, and open to both providing opportunities & receiving support. It is a wonderful thing to grow in your power & success, just remember that there has to be balance. Balance your strength & power with the other gifts & qualities that define the unique woman that you are.
Mark Semple is a Certified Comprehensive Coach and the 2007 International Coach of the Year. Most importantly, Mark is the dedicated supporter of his wife in her business. For Mark’s insights on gaining the support of your partner, and on Success Together, visit: www.successfultogethercoaching.info